Anyone who has read my earlier posts know I was raised in a mixed-faith family. Being raised like this, I was always aware of systems outside Armstrongism. One of my big problems is, both systems I grew up with are quite legalistic. To me, church = laws, and God = angry. Even after leaving Armstrongism and Old Covenant law behind me and accepting a system of grace in the completed work of Jesus Christ, I struggle to this day over my upbringing. And let me tell you about what a failure that makes a person feel like inside where it really counts. Because there is this thing called "sin" in me, and any law points that out, and I am aware of it, and I hate it, but the way to solve this "sin" is far beyond me. Quite literally! Because sin is part of my nature, and nothing in this nature can solve this nature.
I am painfully aware of Paul's lament:
(ROM. 7: 21-24) 21 I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. 22 For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?
How I feel that right this very minute, as I type. I had a terrible past couple days. Someone did wrong by someone very close to me, and I was pretty angry about it. I confronted them, and they were belligerent and unapologetic. That absolutely filled me with anger. I am angry still.
I know my attitude is wrong. To be this angry inside is to flirt with Matthew 5: 21-26. I know I have failed to represent Jesus. I know I am failing to love. I want to do something that is wrong -- but I don't want to want to do something wrong. (Yes, I wrote that sentence correctly. Had to triple check it.) I wish I did not feel like this. I wish my instinct was not to handle things this way. I pray and I pray for God to remove this attitude from me, yet there it is. Events replay in my mind, ruminating, preventing my sleep. It makes me think about all my many failures. And I wonder to myself, how can God ever use a person for good when this is inside them?
This is the problem with the law I grew up with. It can only show us our weaknesses. It cannot ever do anything about it. It cannot change us. It cannot wish for us to do better. Try to keep it. Don't try to keep it. It's all the same. The heart remains beyond its reach. The law doesn't want to kill us. It simply has no choice. The law demands we do the very thing we cannot do. The law is not the problem; we are. The weakness of the law is the weakness in us, but the strength of sin is the law (I COR. 15: 56). We cannot solve this problem on our own.
This is what Paul was trying to tell us. We are utterly incapable in and of ourselves to solve this issue. Mankind needs something else.
(ROM. 7: 24-25) 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!
God through Jesus. That is the answer.
(I COR. 15: 56-57) The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
(HEB. 7: 18-19) 18 For on the one hand there is an annulling of the former commandment because of its weakness and unprofitableness, 19 for the law made nothing perfect; on the other hand, there is the bringing in of a better hope, through which we draw near to God.
The law is the power of death, because of us, but Jesus the power of life.
This answer requires faith, because He made this promise for the future. He isn't going to change this world right this minute. We have to trust Him in order to follow the Spirit. We have to trust Him in order to be His disciple. Have you ever tried to follow Romans 12: 19? I bet you have. I have! And let me tell you, when someone does you properly wrong, it is one of the hardest things there is. Keenly you feel your true nature in that moment. It requires faith to choose the Lord's way, knowing you may never see the benefit of this choice in this lifetime over the immediately gratifying way of nuclear wrath, knowing you may one day even come to pray for forgiveness for the very ones you long to burn utterly to the ground. It means battling over justice vs mercy - knowing that to get justice from a God of justice when you are wronged means you also receive justice for what you've have wronged. It's a humbling thing.
Does Christ crucified mean we have been fixed now? Clearly not. If by "fixed" you mean we are perfected. Paul was writing some time before his death. Was he not a Christian? Of course he was. Yet, there he was, struggling with the sin inside him, same as me. What did Paul have, then? As a Jew born in the Old Covenant period, he had the law, all of it. What was his conclusion about the law? From the law he had awareness of his sin and failures, but not righteousness. So, from the law he received only condemnation. The law forbade him from drawing close to God. From this, he had the truth that he needed someone outside himself to resolve his issue. And he had the answer: God through Jesus. What Paul needed, what we all need, is the righteousness of God in us and credited to us. We have no righteousness of our own, and following laws isn't how we get it (or rather, trying and failing to follow laws). Righteousness is in God alone and faith is how we obtain it. In this hope, we draw near to God.
The law demands we do what we cannot do. Why demand it do what it cannot do? How is that the solution? It is not.
Does not looking to the Old Covenant law mean we have no standards or requirements for righteousness? A moral free for all? Absolutely not. We do have standards and requirements. But those standards and requirements are not centered on Old Covenant law anymore, they are centered on the Holy Spirit. There is law. The law is love and faith.
And yet, here I am, still failing at it.
(ROM. 7: 19) For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice.
But in my failing, I cannot let myself lose hope and give up. I look to One who can save me from myself. (Although I do not understand why He wants to.)
There is some good to come of all this. My sin testifies that God alone is righteous and His judgments just and true. I have earned judgment. As have we all. That's the riddle of forgiveness - in order to get it you have to not deserve it in the first place. His will is going to come about in the end, and my failings will prove He alone is truly worthy of honor. How can anyone accomplish anything good through a heap like me? He can do even this. I am not certain how and I am even less certain why, but I believe He is capable.
(II COR. 12: 9a) ...My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.
So, my motivation is no longer vain fearfulness in the law but thankfulness in salvation, allowing the Holy Spirit to work. Discipleship is a lifestyle.
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It is important that you understand; Everything on this blog is based on the current understanding of each author. Never take anyone's word for it, always prove it for yourself, it is your responsibility. You cannot ride someone else's coattail into the Kingdom. ; )
Acts 17:11
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