Showing posts with label guest piece. Show all posts
Showing posts with label guest piece. Show all posts

Saturday, August 5, 2017

Which Day?

You may have noticed that we haven't been posting much lately. Everyone is so very busy! I haven't had any time at all to sit down and do the writing that I enjoy. Martha has a busy schedule as well, and finds plenty enough to keep her occupied just in daily life. Good thing we have guest authors! Child Survivor wrote a post for us a few months back and liked contributing so much that he's back for another go. We're always happy to hear from our readers.


WHICH DAY???

On social media, in this case Facebook, I keep reading posts by Adventists and previously by the few remaining followers of Herbert W. Armstrong that accuse anyone who doesn't observe their version of “sabbath law” of being “followers of the pope”, “Babylonians”, “lawless”, and “commandment breakers”.  As a “child survivor” of Herbert Armstrong's cult, the Worldwide Church of God, granddaughter cult of the Seventh Day Adventist Church, I will continue to tackle this subject until I know I need to move on.  But regarding some of these accusations from sabbath keepers,  that we are essentially “Commandment breakers” meaning you couldn't possibly love Jesus if you don't “keep His commandments”,  keeping His commandments is ALWAYS about keeping the sabbath.  And I would remind everyone that Jesus never once instructed sabbath keeping, but that's an argument for another day.  My favorite accusation, however, is that those of us who attend church on Sunday are actually “worshiping the sun” or “following the pope”.  That is what I wish to zero in on with this post.  Does the day you congregate on in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord REALLY make a difference with God?  What was the practice of the early church? Did the early Christians keep the sabbath as modern Adventists claim, did they keep Sunday, or were days of the week a non-issue with them? Does the preaching of the word, prayers, singing, and mutual edification Christians experience all go straight out the window because of the day of the week they're doing it?  Let's look deeper.

First thing I wish to start with is a humorous but also sad illustration.  When I was 12 I remember watching the original airing of an “All in the Family” episode. (I'm 53 to save you from having to do that math).  This episode involved Archie's desire to see his newborn grandson, Joey, get baptized.  When he approaches his daughter, Gloria, about it, he begins by reminding her how religious her mother is and that she prays “every day, even when it ain't Sunday, when the Lord ain't listening”.  That remark brought quite the laughter from the studio audience.  While I believe it was intended as humor toward Archie's ignorance and not an attack on religious people, it reminds me of the mentality that is very much alive in sabbath keeping circles that God only acknowledges corporate worship on Saturday.  It brings me to ask this question that I have asked again and again and again and have never once received a straight answer from Adventists, Armstrongists, or any other Sabbatarian.

IS THERE ANY SCRIPTURAL PROHIBITION AGAINST CONGREGATING IN THE NAME OF JESUS ON ANY PARTICULAR DAY OF THE WEEK????

Before I dive into the scriptures, I just beg you to consider the accusation of “sun worship” simply because the day of the week is called “Sunday”.  One person recently told me that's how Sunday started as worship of the sun.  So that makes any religious gatherings “sun worship” simply because allegedly thousands of years ago, extinct religions supposedly worshiped the sun on that day, makes ANY gathering guilty of the same thing?  Are we to assume “once pagan, always pagan”?  If so, then why isn't the same applied to Saturday which was supposedly the day the god Saturn was worshiped?  Why is that day immune from leftover pagan influences of literally thousands of years ago?  I also wish to let you know that I have been attending Protestant worship services almost every Sunday since my conversion from Sabbatarians to Christianity in 1980.  A typical Protestant service involves singing praise to God with either traditional hymns or contemporary songs (which by the way modern Adventists and Church of God Seventh Day congregations use with extreme liberality), prayers offered, offering taken, reading of scripture, a message or sermon from scripture, and either on a monthly or weekly basis, communion.   In the typical Catholic mass you have songs sung, much, and I mean much scripture read from the pulpit, prayers offered for those in need and for the world around them, usually some sort of message, much liturgy which is usually directly from scripture, and communion.  Again, in both cases, does all this count for nothing more than pagan worship simply because of the day of the week it falls on? Especially since Adventist services have so many similarities with Protestant services?

One question I have asked on occasion and only got a response once, was “what if I rest and read scripture on Saturday, but attend a Baptist worship service on Sunday morning, is THAT ok?” The only one who ever responded to that was a pompous Armstrongist who began by saying “while I have ISSUES with Baptists, I guess that's ok”.  Really?  But at least she answered me.  I've also asked the question about Catholics and Evangelicals who are in and out of church before sunset on Saturday, if THEY kept the sabbath?  Only one answered me with “it depends”.  Ok.  But if it is not assumed that if these people who attend church on Saturday at 4pm are not keeping the sabbath, why has it been universally assumed by these people that Paul was “keeping the sabbath” in Acts 13 and 17 simply because he was in a JEWISH gathering on a particular sabbath?  And I would add that these passages simply say what he did on those days, they NEVER tell us that Paul KEPT the entire day, or any part the day at all.  He was just in a place where Jews were gathered to bring the gospel of the Messiah to them.   If being in the synagogue on the sabbath meant Paul and the early believers “kept the sabbath”, then you have to grant the same credit to Christians today who go to Saturday evening services of their “Sunday keeping churches”.  But you never do, ever.  So to be at all credible with your beliefs you either have to drop the argument from Paul's so-called “example” or grant the same credit to millions of Catholics and some Protestants around the globe who are doing what you claim Paul was doing.

Now let's look at the scriptures.  I think everyone reading this KNOWS that there is NO prohibition against gathering to worship collectively on ANY given day in scripture, but most Sabbatarians will never admit it.  But the fact that you know is good for enough for me to continue at this point.  Again, with scripture we begin with the birth of the church from Acts 2:

“Now when the Day of Pentecost had fully come, they were all in one accord in one place.  And suddenly there came a a sound from heaven, as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting.  Then there appeared to them divided tongues, as of fire, and one sat on each of them.  And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.” vs 1-4

Now you see, the Holy Spirit came in power on Pentecost.  When was Pentecost?  THE FIRST DAY OF THE WEEK!  Armstrongists would argue for holy day keeping here, but the fact remains, this miraculous event empowering the followers of Jesus and saving 3,000 souls (read the rest of the chapter for that) COULD have happened on the weekly sabbath, it would have set a precedent...but it DIDN'T.  It happened on what we refer to today as SUNDAY!!!  Is this significant?  New Beginning?  First fruits?  Our Lord's Resurrection?  Take your pick!

Now if you keep reading in Acts 2, you will see what the practice of the early believers was starting in verse 46 “So continuing DAILY in one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they ate their food with gladness and simplicity of heart, praising God and having favor  with all the people.  And the Lord added DAILY those who were being saved”.  Vs 46 & 47

Do you see the word DAILY here?  It doesn't say “weekly” or “from sabbath to sabbath”.  It clearly does not distinguish any day from another.  The church met as often as they could and that would have definitely included what we now call Sunday and yes, Saturday as well.  But days are not emphasized or distinguished, at least not anywhere near to the point that Adventists do.

Another passage from Acts that sabbath keepers absolutely love to rip apart is..from Acts 20 verse 7 “Now on the FIRST DAY OF THE WEEK, when the disciples came together to break bread, Paul, ready to depart the next day, spoke to them and continued his message until midnight”.  WHOA, He preached until midnight?  No wonder poor Eutychus dozed off!  But attention spans were longer then. But that's beside the point.  But do you see?  Breaking of bread (Lord's supper) and preaching, all on the FIRST DAY OF THE WEEK.  This is a Christian gathering and no pope was around to bless it, and it was 300 years before Constantine.  So not only did the early Christians meet daily, but the first day of the week had a special significance and it's recorded in scripture!

Further on in the New Testament we have from 1 Corinthians  16:1&2 “Now concerning the collection for the saints, as I have given orders to churches of Galatia, so you must do also: On the FIRST DAY OF THE WEEK let each one of you lay something aside, storing up as he may prosper, that there be no collections when I come”   I have read Sabbatarians refute the notion that this is promoting meeting on the first day of the week by insisting Paul was telling people to start storing up their offerings on the first day of the week so at the sabbath they would collect it.  Problem being, that's not what he writes.  He tells us that this is the “collection”, not individual storing up.  He's also addressing Christians collectively, not individually...”given orders to the churches..”.  While Paul does say “each one”, the context is still a collective instruction to a group.  The exact procedure here is a bit fuzzy if you ask me, but we are dealing with a culture from 2,000 years ago.  But either way, it goes without saying, the first day of the week is associated as set apart and for an act of Christian worship..offerings.

To sum up, I am not advocating the notion that the sabbath was changed to Sunday.  The sabbath, like the rest of the law was nailed to the cross , Eph 2:15 & Col 2:14-17.  Christians are not obligated to keep any day holy.  Christians have traditionally assembled on Sunday, the first day of the week to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus.  It has traditionally been a “celebration”, not an “obligation”.  Can you understand the difference?  While I do acknowledge that some Christians have applied the 4th commandment to Sunday, I believe they have done so in error.  The Catholic church made every Sunday a “holy day of obligation”, but that simply means they are required to attend mass on that day, not keep it as a “day of rest”.  I also know that some fundamentalist Christians over the last 100 years have erroneously put strict requirements of “keeping the sabbath” meaning Sunday.  While I believe their motives are arguably well-intentioned, their methods in both cases have been misguided, just as I believe modern Sabbatarians are misguided about their  understanding of the sabbath, law, grace, and salvation in general.

I pray that this will not fall on deaf ears.  I so hope you can come to grapple with the following realities..

1.  There is NO PROHIBITION against congregating any day of the week in scripture.

2.  There is no command to keep the sabbath ANYWHERE in the New Testament

3.  Scripture does not have the early church meeting exclusively on ANY day of the week.

4.  There is no mention of the early Christians keeping or meeting on the sabbath.

5.  And finally, keeping ANY DAY will never save you nor help you STAY saved.  Salvation is a gift from God completely unmerited for all of us have sinned and fall short of God's glory.   Rom. 3:23

However, if you can show me any scripture at all that answers my original question, which I will repeat for those of you with short memories...

WHERE IS THE SCRIPTURAL PROHIBITION AGAINST CHRISTIAN ASSEMBLY

ON ANY PARTICULAR DAY OF THE WEEK?

And I would like to add, quotes from Ellen G. White or Herbert W. Armstrong do NOT count as scripture.

Thank you to all of you Christians and Sabbatarians alike for reading this post.  May God enlighten us all with His perfect revelation.


God bless!


Child Survivor, thanks for contributing. Hopefully this provokes some thoughts.

And, hey .. if anyone wants to post a guest article, just reach out. We're always willing to at least consider your piece.

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It is important that you understand; Everything on this blog is based on the current understanding of each author. Never take anyone's word for it, always prove it for yourself, it is your responsibility. You cannot ride someone else's coattail into the Kingdom. ; )
Acts 17:11
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Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Were We Really This Bad?

Today we have a rare treat - a guest post from one of our readers!

This guest post comes to us from Ray, the Child Survivor. Sometimes CS stops by for a comment. Today he's stopping by for a whole guest post about his views on the Sabbath.

It's good to get things off of your chest. Helps the healing process. And it helps us, too. (Definitely helps me to not have to write anything this week.)

We yield the floor to you, Child Survivor....



I spent most of my childhood in a Sabbath-keeping cult, Herbert Armstrong's Worldwide Church of God, the granddaughter cult of the Seventh Day Adventist church. My family left the WCG when I was 13, but was briefly introduced to the Church of God Seventh Day, and the SDA
religion in the 3 years following. Since then I came to faith in Jesus alone, and since 2009 have been engaged in conversation with current members of these movements (especially Adventists) through email and social media and have had quite the education on where these people stand on scripture and other subjects. This post will focus on what I have discovered with their arguments on "law" and the "Sabbath". My findings are fascinating and as follows:

1 John 3:23, John 6:35-40, Ephesians 2:8 & 9, John 5:18 and ANY references to us not being under law seem to have been stricken from all their copies of the Bible. If you quote such verses to these people, they can't seem to even SEE them!

EVERY SINGLE TIME in scripture the word "Commandments" ALWAYS refers to the 10 given to Moses on Mount Sinai, except in Ephesians 2:15, THERE the word means something else.

And when they say "keep the commandments", they really mean "keep the Sabbath".
They will give endless scriptures (mostly Old Testament) for keeping the Sabbath, but when asked how to properly keep the Sabbath, they suddenly don't have time, hurl insults, or go silent.

The law of the Sabbath is bound for all eternity, but laws regarding HOW to keep the Sabbath are either "ceremonial" or "magnified." Any laws that fall under these classifications are always laws they just don't want to keep, like no kindling fires on the Sabbath or staying in your dwellings.

Regarding the other commandments, "thou shalt not kill" is ignored beyond the threshold of Adventist hospitals. (Elective abortions) "thou shalt not commit adultery" does not apply to Armstrongist evangelists. (marital affairs was the norm) "Thou shalt not steal" does not apply if done for the sake of "the church" (coercing people to triple tithe or shoving the offering plate at people more than once per service) simply to feed the wealth and power of the church and it's leaders.

Regarding the Sabbath, the fact that Jesus and Paul were in Jewish gatherings on the Sabbath AUTOMATICALLY means they were keeping the entire day sacred, yet they refuse to grant this same criteria to any Catholics or Protestants who are in and out of church or mass before sunset on Saturday afternoons. Usually they don't answer the question
if you ask them if the same applies here.

Sabbath law regarding "no paid work" on the Sabbath does not apply to pastors.

They claim that they do not believe that we are saved by keeping the law, but if we are truly saved, we will keep the law, thus keeping the law is how we STAY saved...but only THEIR version of the law. Most laws in the Old Testament are discarded.

Many Proof-texts from the New Testament used for Sabbath keeping for Gentile Christians don't even mention the Sabbath.

The Sabbath is always calculated by using the ROMAN CATHOLIC CALENDAR which uses the names of pagan deities in the months and days of the week.

Sabbath law of "sunset to sunset" doesn't apply to parts of the planet that will go without sunrise or sunset for months at a time. (like Barrow, Alaska) But a consensus is never reached on how to resolve the dilemma.

"Jesus being Lord of the Sabbath" NEVER, EVER means that Jesus is more important than the Sabbath!

The Sabbath is God's greatest gift to humanity. Sorry Jesus, you're not number 1 with these folks.

Congregating in the name of Jesus, singing His praises, hearing the Word preached, and encouraging other Christians AUTOMATICALLY becomes SUN WORSHIP because you are doing it on the first day of the calendar week. Yet congregating on Sunday becomes okay with Armstrongist when a holy day falls on Sunday. And with Adventists, midweek services NEVER mean that they are worshiping the god associated with that day of the week, such as Wednesday.

With Armstrongists, it was always an absolute sin to enter a retail store on the Sabbath, but eating in a restaurant after Sabbath services or buying take-out...was okay.

Working on the Sabbath is treated as the "unpardonable sin", yet when Sabbath keepers need the services of those who are BREAKING the Sabbath by working...like paramedics, police and fire fighters, or the utilities, suddenly they forget about the laws of working on the Sabbath and use their services.

In Adventist, Armstrongist, and other Sabbath keeping groups, the Roman Catholic church is demonized as "the Great Whore of Babylon"...never to be believed, never to be trusted. BUT, when the Catholic church makes the claim to have changed the Sabbath, they all of a sudden become THE AUTHORITY.

The Sabbath was changed by the Pope, but wait, it was changed by Constantine, yes, the pope, oh wait, Constantine, uh....no it's the Antichrist, oh wait... Any writing from early church fathers like Ignatius and Justin Martyr are virtually ignored, or these early church leaders are maligned by Adventists and demonized by Armstrongists.

The Lord's Day in Revelation 1:10 is clearly the Sabbath, even though the Sabbath is not called that ANYWHERE in scripture.

The most coveted, desired "rest" is where you attend services, eat green bean casserole, and if you're an Armstrongist, drink heavily on Saturday. The REST Jesus offers in Matthew 11:28 is not desired.(why should it be? After all, Armstrongists go out of their way to avoid even talking about Jesus).

They also seem to be reading a different Bible than the rest of Christianity. Their versions seem to say some strange things and omit others, such as.....

Their copies of the Bible seem to state that Adam, Noah, and Abraham ALL kept the Sabbath, even though the word "Sabbath" doesn't appear in scripture until the 10 commandments are given to Moses in Exodus 16.

There is no mention of any humans knowing of such a ritual prior to Exodus 16.

The main point Jesus was making to the rich young ruler was that he had to keep the Sabbath, which isn't even mentioned in the dialogue. Their versions of this story also exclude the part of Jesus telling him to sell all his possessions and follow Him and he will have treasures in heaven (something Armstrongists vehemently deny).

The main message of the 3 angels in Revelation 14 is for everyone to keep the Sabbath, even though the Sabbath is nowhere mentioned in the entire book of Revelation.
Those who are faithful who will be granted eternal life are those who keep the Sabbath, even though when Jesus talks about His separating the sheep from the goats in Matthew 25, the Sabbath is nowhere mentioned.

They seem to see Sabbath keeping as the true mark of a disciple, even though Jesus said that it was us loving one another where the world would know we are His.
Another puzzling thing about their approach to scripture is how they pounce on New Testament passages that mention the Sabbath, but never quote entire verses or read the entire stories, such as the Sabbath-keeping Jews wanting to throw Jesus off a a cliff or starting a riot when Paul was converting the masses to Christ. They constantly quote "Sabbath was made for man"...but never finish the thought with "not man for the Sabbath" unless they are cornered.

They never quote the passage regarding the "Sabbath day's journey" in Acts 1:12 because that would destroy the attendance of the sparsely scattered memberships of the Armstrongist splinter groups or the Hebrew Roots movement where people commonly travel up to 2 hours to attend Sabbath services. They never quote Colossians 2:16 except out of context and many refuse to acknowledge that when Paul says "Sabbath" that he actually MEANS "Sabbath."

Their Bibles also seem to exclude the final chapter of John's gospel. 3 times in chapter 21 Jesus asked Peter if he loved Him, when Peter answered "yes", each time Jesus said "feed my sheep" (depending on the translation). He NEVER said "keep the Sabbath"...yet that is exactly what these people are convinced the only Jesus asks His followers to do.

But the most troubling thing I find with the Sabbath keepers and their twisted views is where they stand on Jesus. If you look at the "Bible Sabbath Association" which claim to be unification of different Sabbath keeping groups and their loyalty to the 4th commandment, you see that
these groups views on the Lord Jesus Christ RANGE from Trinitarians to Arians to Unitarians. So the Sabbath is important, but Who exactly Jesus is, is a secondary issue? Seriously? Obviously they believe keeping the Sabbath is what saves and what one believes about Jesus is irrelevant.

Also regarding Jesus, when you ask about any relationship they may have with our Lord, Messiah, Son of God,..... They always, and I mean ALWAYS, immediately steer the discussion to their own righteousness by quoting "If you love Me keep my commandments," which of course they have been taught that the word commandments can ONLY mean the 10 given to Moses....which THEY keep by keeping the Sabbath. Talk about Jesus, they will talk about the Sabbath, and ultimately THEMSELVES, because legalism is nothing more than cleverly disguised SELF WORSHIP.



Well there you have it.

Lots of Sabbath-centrism going on out there in the Adventist spin-off groups like Armstrongism. Surprising, coming from Sabatarians? It's their defining characteristic, after all.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and concerns with the planet, Child Survivor. Taking the time to write all of this and send it in is not easy. Some people might find it intimidating.

We appreciate all of our readers. Hopefully someone out there will relate and find some comfort in what you've shared.

God bless!




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It is important that you understand; Everything on this blog is based on the current understanding of each author. Never take anyone's word for it, always prove it for yourself, it is your responsibility. You cannot ride someone else's coattail into the Kingdom. ; )
Acts 17:11
************

Monday, September 9, 2013

Reader Testimonies - Centurion

It's time once again for one of my very favorite things about having this blog -- reader testimonials!

Here’s a testimonial from one of our readers who is going by the name “Centurion". This reader left Armstrongism just recently, and what a story they have. I am eager to share this with you. By the end of it I found myself sad that it was over. I hope you enjoy this and find some inspiration in it.

I would have you know - the reason we do reader testimonials is so that you, whoever you are, can see that you are not alone out there. There are others out there like you. Maybe you are currently attending a Church of God splinter group but you are hesitant to leave. Maybe you have already left and you wonder what others went through. Regardless of where you are, I hope you find something in these testimonials that help you along your way. I hope you find something you can relate to. And that they bless your heart and give you reassurance.


I was born into the Worldwide Church of God.

I used to feel really lucky about that. Turns out that might be right after all, but more on that toward the end of this testimony.

I grew up thinking that Herbert W. Armstrong was God’s end-time apostle, and the Elijah for-to-come, a man who was like a wise-old grandfather who was close to God and understood Bible Prophecy and held the very keys of unlocking Bible Prophecy! He was probably one of the two witnesses of Revelation and God would not let this man die before the return of Christ. His name was effectively revered in our home.

Conversely, I understood that all the rest of the world, including all other “Christians” were deceived and not a part of the true body of God. Those poor people – if only they would listen to Mr. Armstrong, but apparently God was not working with them. At all.

I followed all the clean and unclean meats laws, paid double and sometimes triple tithes, Sabbaths and holy days, and all the other Armstrong doctrines and believed them with all my heart. I believed that the US and England were secretly the tribes of Ephraim and Manasseh, that we were the Philadelphia Church era, and that this 19-year time cycle was important. All we all had to pay and pray for “The Work” of preaching our unique gospel to go out to all the world.

I was part of this glorious “work”, so I could tell myself I did not care if I could not fit in at school, believe my history teachers, compete in sports (due to Sabbath and Friday night conflicts), or go on dates. I tried to overcome poor grades caused by keeping feasts and therefore missing weeks of school which eventually gave me trouble getting into the colleges of my choice.

My small sacrifices were worth it because we were told how successful the Plain Truth magazine was, and how Foreign Leaders around the world wanted to speak to Mr. Armstrong and needed his advice; the church was growing and my whole world revolved around being in “The Church” – no friends in “the world” because we were told not to… what does light have to do with darkness?

As a child, my parents told me I would never go to school, because the church was going to “flee to the place of safety” before I ever reached school age. Then I reached school age. “Don’t worry,” I was told, “the dates may have been wrong, but it will still happen soon – you will never go to high-school.” By the time I graduated college, Worldwide had begun to change things, and I began a life-long process of spiritual blinders coming off. Blinders I did not want to come off, or even realize I had on. I was not deceived, not me, I was special, I had the secret knowledge that no one else in school had, no one at work had; how could the chosen, the called out, the elect ever be deceived? God would not allow his church to be deceived!

A crack forms in Armstrongism


I did not leave the Worldwide Church of God. I was kicked out. Marked, and disfellowshipped before the whole church.

It sounds like a scene from an anti-Christian movie, but this happened to me. The minister actually gave a sermon about how we should not talk with, or fellowship with those who are marked. (Well that “light has nothing to do with darkness” bit sure backfired!) And I got walked out during the sermonette as a visual aid to all 400 people in attendance at church that Saturday. My crime? The minister found out that I had read some “outside the church literature”. I was “turned in” by my well-intentioned aunt. Oh they gave me one chance to “repent” and never do that again; but at this point I actually wanted to know what other churches taught. I told the minister , “I think I should read whatever I want for as long as I want, so long as I remember to think.” My reward? Bad Christian – you are hereby banished from the body of Christ! This was devastating. I had no friends outside “the one true church”. I had no life outside the church. I could not even apply for a new job, as I had no one I could put as a reference! I learned something critical which is this: “the church” is not the Worldwide Church of God, a physical organization, but rather a spiritual organism composed of all the people God had given his Holy Spirit to. My first step away from Armstrongism; the first fracture in the shackles on my soul.
Cults have “conditional love”, and love you as you support the organization, but hate you if you leave.

One thing was certain in my mind: I was not going to get my life burned down by a church organization again.

Another crack forms – Church Eras


I joined an Armstrong split-off group. (retroactive facepalm) It was the church group whose “outside literature” I was reading that got me kicked out of WCG.

At that point, I still embraced the vast majority of Armstrong teachings, but there was no path back to WCG, nor a desire to return, so an alternative to WCG made perfect sense at the time. From this group I learned that the “Church Era” theory was false.

The church era theory taught that the seven churches found in Revelation 2 and 3 were actually representative of time eras. The churches/eras are Ephesus, Smyrna, Pergamum, Thyatira, Sardis, Philadelphia, and Laodicea.

WCG taught that they were the “Philadelphia era”, probably because there is nothing but praise for that church, and because it’s nearly at the end of the list and therefore at the end “time”. The whole Church Era concept was fraudulent. As proof, all you have to do to shut that concept down is to say “prove it” – which you can’t. Done.

But some argue, “No you can’t ‘prove it’ but it still makes sense. So it’s still true because it fits.” But does it?

I was told to draw 19 lines on a piece of paper, each represents 100 years; it was another way of looking at 100 separate “19 year time cycles” (anyone associated with WCG should be familiar with Herbert Armstrong’s love of 19 year time-cycles).

Now let’s fill in the chart:

The last 100 years could be filled in by the Philadelphian church. But also the Laodicean church was to emerge when the Philadelphian church was hiding in the ‘place of safety’ – so there was overlap between the two eras during the last 100 year time era.

Sardis, taught by WCG to be the “dead church” of the Seventh Day Adventists, also existed simultaneously alongside of Philadelphia and Laodecea – so that last 100 year time period on your paper… shade that in with 3 overlapping and simultaneous church eras.

The first era was Ephesus, that was believed to have ended with the death of John the apostle around 91AD – so the first 100 year period? Shade that in with Ephesus.

Ok, the first and last 100 year periods are gone, and we’ve used up 4 church eras in only 200 years. That’s 3 church eras left to cover the remaining 1,700 years! This doesn’t sound very much like church eras at all and doesn’t make any logical sense.

So now that I don’t believe in church eras, or in church exclusivity, I started to be on the lookout for other potential issues than need a bit of tuning up. Armstrongism was still clearly true in my mind at this time, but there were a few issues, so there could be a few more. I decided to keep my eyes open.

Why aren’t we keeping ALL the laws?


I started reading the Bible, mostly Old Testament and happened across Nehemiah 10, which read…
And if the people of the land bring ware or any victuals on the Sabbath day to sell, that we would not buy it of them on the Sabbath, or on the holy day
Victuals literally means food prepared to eat. So, no eating out on the Sabbath then? Bummer, because I loved eating out on the Sabbath – nearly the entire church group I was now attending with went out together to eat at a restaurant every Sabbath after services. But here it was in my Bible, and so I followed my conscience and stopped eating out on Saturdays.

People started asking me why I wasn’t eating out with everyone on the Sabbath anymore, I simply told them: I don’t believe we’re supposed to because it says so in Nehemiah 10. This started to become quite an offense to everyone. I didn’t even need to be in the room, my simple lack of attendance at these meals became sore point for many in the church group. One of the church leaders tried to “explain” to me that I didn’t understand the verse correctly, and that he would sit down with me and explain it so I could eat out again. I told him “I have a Strong’s Concordance and a Young’s, I’ve looked up all those words, I have no doubt about what they mean.” No further attempt was made to reason with me. My loss, they figured. They told me I’d come around as God gave me understanding.

Week after week I didn’t eat out and the minister begrudgingly / patiently tolerated it. But every week I didn’t eat out was like poking him in the eye.

But my take away was this: Why are we keeping only SOME of the laws and not ALL of them? Doesn’t it say in the Bible that we are to keep the whole law? And not to take anything away or add anything to it?!?

But I was still a law-keeper, a legalist, I thought we just weren’t keeping the laws right, and Armstrong had a little more wrong than I’d thought.

Bible Editing


The minister at this church group also had a bad habit. He tended to “correct” the words in the Bible to be what he meant for them to be. This was normal in Worldwide. We’d go back to Strong’s Concordance, find another place where the same Greek or Hebrew word was translated some other way elsewhere in the Bible, and substitute this new word into place in the offending verse, and voila! Instant meaning changes! But this guy did it a lot – to the point it started to bother me. I started keeping “tally marks” at the top of my sermon notes, so that every time he would change a word I would keep track. I did this for many months. I call this the Strong’s Game. He always scored. Sometimes he only scored 5 or 6, but other sermons he would score in the 30s or 40s!!

I wondered , “Why can’t I just read my Bible and believe it?” It seemed to me, that the more we played this Strong’s Game, the more we were correcting the Bible instead of letting the Bible correct us. One day after the sermon, where this minister spent a goodly amount of time telling us that Jesus was crucified on an upright stake and not a cross, I confronted him about it – nicely.

I said, “My Bible translates the word as a ‘cross’, and I’ve read in history that at different times the Romans crucified people both ways – so how did he know which way Christ was crucified?” Furthermore, to his point that “God would not allow Jesus to be crucified on a cross because the cross is pagan.” He said the cross was actually the symbol for the letter “T” that stood for “Tamuz”.  (They had English in ancient Babylon?) I replied that the upright post was also pagan, and that May-poles, obelisks and all manner of pagan phallic symbols filled the pages of pagan histories, therefore whether or not there was a cross beam, Jesus was without question crucified on a pagan symbol.

His reaction? Suppressed anger, red-in-the-face anger, though he did nothing yet. Still, the line had been crossed.

It was only a matter of time now before I would be kicked out of this church – this WCG split-off church that did not practice disfellowshipping – as well. I was not towing the line. But they were wrong about things, and the more things I caught, the more I got on my guard. Now I was listening to every message closely, listening for the errors (and marking the times he corrected the Bible in the Strong’s game).

Put out…. Again


Eventually the church that taught me to question everything and not to believe the speaker but rather to “believe your Bible” had that doctrine starting to backfire.

This time when I was “put out of the church” it did not faze me at all – I was ready, and when I was kicked out this time for finding yet more laws the church wasn’t keeping, my attitude was that of “challenge accepted”.

And so, my Holy Spirit was revoked - again - by no longer being part of the one true body of Christ in the form of the church - again.  This time I was cast into utter darkness over the phone.

During this phone call, I was actually reading this minister scriptures directly from the Bible and asking him to respond logically with scriptures while he instead shouted over top of me that “you do err, not knowing the scriptures”. I read him more things, and he yelled over top of me as if from some rehearsed script. He was livid. He was about to hang up and I said to him: you realize I’m reading you scriptures and you can’t respond to them right? You don’t have any way to defend against what I’m reading to you in your own Bible, you’re only recourse is to shout over me?
>
He responded that I was put out of the church and kicked me out. I took it as a win. This time I was ready for it, it did not destroy me, or hurt at all – I stuck to the Bible, and he stuck to his old Worldwide ways.

It seemed to me that the Worldwide ways were starting to appear to bear bad fruit. By now I’d now seen many lives destroyed by Armstrongism. I’d now seen marriages broken up by order of Armstrong ministers. My love for Herbert Armstrong was all but wiped out as I had seen Herbert Armstrong’s MANY failed prophecies – hundreds.

I also learned this: Cults have “conditional love”, and love you as you support the organization, but hate you if you leave. I can testify.

You’ve got to be kidding


Yet somehow I managed to reason, “Ok, so apparently Armstrong’s prophecies were all totally wrong, and a lot of his other doctrines were wrong, but some of his other doctrines were still correct, right?”

If you guessed that the next thing I would do was to find yet another Armstrong split-off group, you would be absolutely correct. (facepalm)

But that’s how God was working with me – remember that I was born into this cult, and thought that I was persevering though trials, but holding fast to the knowledge revealed to the saints. I was slowly but surely taking steps out, one doctrine at a time, but it was not my intension to do so.

Every time I made some large steps away from Armstrongism via new understanding, I was blessed in other ways, sometimes impressively; and I did not believe that Satan blessed people to trick them out of Armstrongism. This was a common saying among Armstrong’s people, that if someone left the Armstrong church and had a difficult life afterward that it was because God was cursing them for leaving, but if you were blessed when you left as I was, then Satan was blessing you to fool you into staying out of the one true church. Reminds me of the witch trials – throw her in the water, if she swims she’s a witch and we’ll burn her. Can’t win for losing this one.

When I accepted another step away from Armstrongism, I noticed something in my head, that I now believe to be the Holy Spirit, pointing me to the next thing to challenge. Sometimes I stepped up to that challenge right away. Other times I’d delay, often for months or years before I’d really challenge that next doctrine. All the while, I attended Saturday church with this last Armstrongist group.

I remember talking with a buddy who would later be instrumental to my leaving Armstrongism. We’d read about the fruits of the Holy Spirit, and we saw one of them was ‘joy’.
  “We need that one” I said.
  He agreed, “And we don’t have it, and I think I really want that one. Joy would be my favorite fruit”.
    “I’m angry all the time at everything”.
       “And I hate everyone, and everyone’s an idiot”.
          “Maybe we’re doing something wrong.”

Lifeline tossed down


I was blessed with the acquaintance of a few real friends in this third group. Real friends – people that were true. No small amount of emphasis should be placed on this.

Nearly everyone in this final group were lifelong ex-members of the Worldwide church, and had found themselves orphaned away from other Armstrong groups, and formed a church by default because they had no other place to go. I still believe most of them to be honest and good people who were sincerely deceived.

One friend I found I happily found I could talk to about the doctrinal errors I would hear in the sermons. He was an older gentleman, superficially a grumpy old man, but he was wise and wily. Every Sabbath, after the sermon one of us would find the other one, and we’d say something like, “did you catch X today?” and we’d totally trash the errors in the sermon, often using our Bibles right then and there. We did not trash the speaker, our effort was to improve our understanding, and to identify error to improve our beliefs and seek truths. This went on for years.

I lost an argument


I was always sincere in my beliefs and was honest with myself in what I’d argued regarding Armstrong’s teachings, though there was less and less I actually agreed with. It almost felt like I was clearing a forest, one tree at a time. But now there weren’t a lot of trees left, and I didn’t want to lose those precious last few; besides, I had no doubt in the requirements of the Sabbath and the Holy Days, those trees were mighty indeed.

In retrospect, the reason I didn’t actively start reviewing every doctrine I believed in is because one of the hardest things to do in life is to eat crow and admit that the guns you stuck to were completely false. What if I was wrong? Have you ever argued with someone, and then come to a point in the conversation where you suddenly realized you might actually be wrong? What a horrible sinking feeling. Do you stick to your guns and keep arguing? Run away? Come clean? There’s nothing good, short-term, at the end of this. Fortunately, I knew I was not wrong.

Those who would say, “You should not discuss religion with someone and all you can do is pray for them”, I believe to be missing a big part of the picture. I understand this point of view, and the allure of not having to do anything at all except talk to God because it’s an easier thing to do. However, is that the Biblical example? We see Paul kept trying to win over the Jews and Gentiles, despite personal hardships (beatings, stoning, shipwrecks, left for dead etc.) and tried to convince them away from their defunct or false religions and into Christianity (Phil. 1:22-24).

Paul said in 1 Cor. 19-20:
19 For though I am free from all, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win more of them. 20 To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though not being myself under the law) that I might win those under the law.
I think the example here is not that we can't help - Paul says he planted, Apollos watered, but Jesus gave the increase - instead, I think our approach needs to be like Paul's. For Armstrongists, we should approach them as one under the law and help win them to Jesus. I think our mistakes (especially after being IN Armstrongism) include bad-mouthing the prophet/apostle, and engaging in name calling. That's sure to turn those people away. But if we can follow Paul's example of being all things to all people, then I think we have a large role to play. That was the case for me.

Friends that didn’t give up


Another close friend had completely left Armstrongism. It was kind of shocking. We were in this third church group together for a few years. We grew up in Armstrongism and he’d thrown the baby out with the bath water! Sure there were some doctrinal issues, but we should just fix them, understand them and get better, not abandon everything we’d learned in our lives, right?

But he did abandon everything. I thought he’d lost his mind, and was deceived – there was not much I could do but pray for him, because I couldn’t actually win arguments with him – he did a lot of homework and was ready with answers. I was good at this too, but here I was on the losing end – had I lost my edge? No, he would come around someday.

I never really lost an argument before, at least not one that I had to admit to myself that I’d lost. Remember that Armstrongism is an entire framework of beliefs. Doctrine X can’t be wrong, because that would affect doctrine Y, and no we can’t argue about doctrine Y either because that supports doctrine Z and so on. Yet now I found in my religious discussions that I couldn’t solve some of the logic problems that hadn’t occurred to me before.

The problem is that I was discussing doctrines with an ex-worldwide member, someone who knew how Armstrongists think and reason, and he could make points than no Protestant or Catholic ever could. People like this were put-out and excommunicated for a reason back in WCG days - they know what to say, they know how you think.

New Challenges


I remained honest in my beliefs, and my arguments were for myself as much as anyone else. My buddy would drop little time-bombs off in my head. I knew what he was doing, but I could take it, right? For example, he mentioned that the doctrine of the United States and Britain being Manasseh and Ephraim was just false. Well that’s a pretty core belief that Worldwide held. All the prophecies were dependent on it, and it was one of the ‘vital keys’ to understanding Armstrong’s prophecies. I looked into it, and couldn’t find a shred of evidence supporting the claim. Another core doctrine gone.

I quietly knew there was nothing prophetical that Armstrong said that was correct. Ouch.

But at least I’m not a Trinitarian! I’m not a Sunday keeper! There was always some reason not to check out other churches, not to abandon everything I’ve known in my life.

Then something odd happened. I’d never experienced anything quite like this. I felt an actual urge to go check out the Sabbath and the Holy days. What?! No! I don’t want to do that – these were some of the only doctrines I had left! If I didn’t have these, then I had nothing! Let me be clear, I did not want to investigate the Sabbath and holy days. We are nothing if not law keepers. I’m not going to do that. But some urge inside me pointed me to do that. Seriously? I really don’t want to do that. But that’s what I had to do. I felt a sinking feeling when I contemplated what would happen if I were to lose this argument.

Fine. I’ll look into it. But I have my proof-texts – I can do this. I still felt pretty good about keeping the law. After all, they’re God’s laws, and God changes not!

The Law


This study expanded from just the Sabbath to all the laws we were keeping – I didn’t realize I was challenging legalism. After all, who wants to be illegal? Nevertheless, that’s what was happening. I had to look at the entire requirement of the law itself – into the covenant issue that supports the Sabbath and the Holy Days. I felt a degree of confidence. I’m on solid ground here.

Acts 15 was a critical puzzle piece for me. Here was a New Testament church group that was being told to “be circumcised”:
24 Since we have heard that some who went out from us have troubled you with words, unsettling your souls, saying, “You must be circumcised and keep the law” —to whom we gave no such commandment—
Wait, what was that? “The law”?? “To whom we gave no such commandment”??? What the…. Wait, no!

This scripture was just about circumcision! Not the law. But there it was – and there was nothing I could do about it.

And then Paul follows that up with these verses:
28 For it seemed good to the Holy Spirit, and to us, to lay upon you no greater burden than these necessary things: 29 that you abstain from things offered to idols, from blood, from things strangled, and from sexual immorality. If you keep yourselves from these, you will do well.
That’s it? That’s all that the gentiles were ever supposed to do? No mention of the Ten Commandments? No other burden at all? I had just learned that I’m a gentile, and now this? Repercussions of this knowledge started bouncing around in my head.

Hebrews also started saying some really crazy things:
Heb. 9:13 In that He says, “A new covenant,” He has made the first obsolete. Now what is becoming obsolete and growing old is ready to vanish away.
Heb. 7: 22 by so much more Jesus has become a surety of a better covenant.
Heb. 8: 7 For if that first covenant had been faultless, then no place would have been sought for a second.
You can read Hebrews any way you want, but you can’t get that the old covenant is still in effect.

But the covenant is NOT the law – sure the old COVENANT is gone, but the law remains, right? I was taught that the covenant is just the agreement to keep the law; it’s not the law itself. The covenant changes, but the law remains. After all, God says “I change not”!
Ex. 34:28 So he was there with the Lord forty days and forty nights; he neither ate bread nor drank water. And He wrote on the tablets the words of the covenant, the Ten Commandments.
Seriously? The covenant IS the Ten Commandments? My subconscious must have known that was a bad thing to learn. Because if the commandments of Moses ARE the old covenant, and the old covenant is gone, then….

No, this was unthinkable. Surely the law remains! I found these scriptures regarding the law in the new covenant.
Romans 7:6 But now we have been delivered from the law, having died to what we were held by, so that we should serve in the newness of the Spirit and not in the oldness of the letter.
Galatians 5:4 You have become estranged from Christ, you who attempt to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace.
Romans 10:4 For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes.
Hebrews 7:18 For on the one hand there is an annulling of the former commandment because of its weakness and unprofitableness.
And there are many more scriptures regarding the law, similar to the above, I won’t put them all here, but there are a lot of them. A lot.

The Roller Coaster


All the tenants of Armstrongism were chopped down now, and I came to a point I call “the Roller Coaster”.

Death blows had been struck to my religion and I realized I had nothing left of Armstrongism. This was incredibly unsettling. I felt like I was in free-fall. Prophetic events of Armstrong, gone. Identity of nations and church eras, gone. The law, gone. Sabbaths and holy days, gone. What did I have left?? Tithing, unclean meats, gone. Church exclusivity, gone. The Armstrong gospel, gone. My identity is being stripped away. The law, gone. Is this what it feels like to be deceived??

It was so emotionally scary, and I felt like I was spiritually going over the big hill on a roller coaster. My whole life, and all these challenges to Armstrongism were click-click-click going up the hill, but now, … now I’m finally going over the hill and I don’t know what happens next, but it is so scary. There is no escape, and I don’t want to go.

Jesus.

This new guy I’d never really been taught about but read all about. The Gospel. Jesus was all I had left, and he’s the one who caught me. Jesus is what’s left when everything else is stripped away.

Peace.

For the first time in my life, I felt peace. No more anger at other churches for being wrong. No more frustration at other Christians for refusing to see the Armstrong truth. No more hating Christmas carols. (Why did I hate “joy to the world” so much?) No more anger with incompetent or deceitful ministers. No more Puritanical anger towards any behavior that didn’t meet the Church’s high standards. No more ager at my own lack of being able to keep the very law I defend. No more sweet-sweet anger at all. Just peace. And I liked it.

Joy. Finally!

As I started re-educating myself in the scriptures I found that elusive fruit of the spirit – joy. Yes, this is good and real, not self-righteousness, or arrogance that I know something others don’t know, but just real honest joy for the chance Jesus gave me. It feels like this huge weight has been lifted off my heart; a weight I clung to for so long, for no reason. I have never felt freedom like this.

Another friend, who was never associated with the Worldwide Church of God or its many splinter groups, also had a lot of answers I needed. I would assault him with my various proof-texts from Armstrongism, and he had some profound-while-simple answers for me, patiently explaining things. He’ll never know how much I needed those answers. There were lots of proof-texts to investigate, but now seen in the light of New Testament Christianity, and the new covenant, things made sense.

I didn’t have all the answers, but I had to step out on faith that the answers would come, and they did.

The Worldwide Church of God always taught that Paul is extremely difficult to understand. Yet now the writings of Paul were simple, and plain. Paul became easy to follow as he taught about the law, grace, faith, salvation and the gospel – it felt like the New Testament was magically unlocked as it never had been for me before.

Epilogue      


Thankfully I never converted anyone to Armstrongism. I tried. I thank God for that failure.

My buddies pointed me at church groups that could help me in my new-found Christian walk. I’d always identified as a Christian, but now I think back that I wasn’t really one after all. I’m the walking wounded, wondering if I can really be redeemed for the lifetime of deception I’ve lived. Jesus can fix that. God, I love you.

It’s not all easy either, being on this side. I’ve had to forgive people, and that is hard to do – but found later that I’ve been the one who’s healed by forgiving other people (even if they think they’ve done no wrong). For me, that’s really hard to do, but it gets easier each time. You can’t understand it till you try it.

I’ve had to eat a lot of crow. I have friends and family still in COG splinter groups. I’ve had to tell my parents that I’ve left the church they raised me in – that they’re still in – and this creates a lot of family and social awkwardness for us. They think I’ve thrown the baby out with the bath water. I pray for them most every day and try to plant subtle time-bombs in their heads when I can. I want them to have the peace and joy I have.

But through the challenges of leaving the Worldwide Church of God culture, and the challenges of living this new covenant Christianity, it’s still completely worth it. To know that I have life is so amazing. To not wonder if I’m going to make it into the afterlife. To know that I’m forgiven, and yes, even will be in heaven someday – that’s provable too. The peace and joy and life is worth it. I finally understand what Paul meant when he said:

Romans 8:18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

I spent a good year kicking myself for being so stupid and believing things so easily disprovable. How could I believe things that were so well documented and patently false? What an idiot I’ve been. So much to atone for, so much humbling myself before friends and family, because it’s not easy to admit to being so monumentally wrong.

Recently, I’ve thanked the Lord Jesus for giving me the Worldwide experience. I’ve mostly stopped kicking myself. I am actually pretty lucky to have been in the Worldwide Church of God. Why? Contrast! I know what I believe, not just because my parents told me this or ministers preached that, but because I’ve studied and am ready with an answer. I can help people still in the clutches of Adventism and Armstrongism and Legalism in a way few other people are able. I can show people that the opposite of legalism is not “illegalism”, but rather a real relationship with God.

It wasn’t a lifetime for nothing, or a wasted life, it was the journey God set for me to take, and He never gave up on me. It’s been an amazing roller coaster ride, and it’s not over.


Thanks, "Centurion". We hope all the best for you on your journey. There is much hope in your testimony!
No... not over at all. Just beginning.
We are very proud of you for having faith in our Savior and stepping into the New Covenant in His finished work on the cross. Praise the Lord!

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Reader Testimonials -- John of Ohio

From time to time we get letters from our readers. I like to know how people were drawn in to Armstrongism and how they left. My favorites are the stories of challenges overcome and second chances. I think you’ll find that in this story today, but you’ll have to look hard for it. Because in today’s personal experience letter from our readers we’ll see how escaping Armstrongism is not always a bed of roses.

I know from personal experience that there are some callous and inconsiderate souls out there who deny that anyone had a bad experience in Armstrongism. I’m sorry, but that’s delusional. There is a very real, very serious reason why we have links to suicide hotline and help groups here on ABD.
I want everyone to know this: just because you leave Armstrongism, doesn’t mean Armstrongism has left you. Even if we come to grace and step into the New Covenant in the blood of our Lord Jesus, some wounds remain. Sometimes we have gotten ourselves into something and those situations have lasting effects. God isn’t going to whisk those things away. They have to be worked out. He will help us, but we have made our own bed.
Take me for example. Time was lost and loved ones have passed away while I was preoccupied with my splinter group. I will never get back that time nor my loved ones, who should have been my business all along. I have to deal with this for the rest of my life.
These are the hidden things, the damage we do that we don’t see until it’s too late. It is very real. It is very serious. And so far as I have control over it, I will not allow the first word from a person so cold and wretched as to deny that people have had their lives damaged and even ruined by Armstrongism.

But if you would allow me a bit of speculation, I have noticed that the most common problems for people leaving Armstrongism are marital problems. Maybe I’m wrong about that, but that’s what I’ve seen.
Marriages in Armstrongism are often a world apart from marriages in a grace-based system. Like all relationships in a legalistic system, they are conditional. The entire marriage could have rested entirely on conditions (of belief, action, submission, or whatever.) When the church changes, the conditions change, and the dynamic of the relationship either changes or disintegrates. Often there are scars left that need time to heal. Sometimes, one spouse cannot bring themselves to overcome those scars.

I wish I had better resources available for those of you who need marital counselling. I am working on it. Please contact me if you believe you can help people with this need! My email is listed in the menu to the right.

John from Ohio wants to share his experience with you, warts and all. He wants anyone who feels as he does to know they aren’t alone.
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My experiences in leaving the Worldwide Church of God, which happened in the autumn of 1995, a bit over 13 years after becoming a baptized member, are directly related to how I affiliated with the church. It was different, perhaps, than most.
As it happens, I left the church with no rancor, confrontation, or other immediate difficulties with former members. I simply walked away, with a single letter of “resignation” to the local fill-in pastor at the time, and that was it. I had no phone calls, no confrontations, no interpersonal matters of concern.
Why, then, was my leaving the church perhaps as significant as those who left behind now-contentious former friends, or had other unfortunate difficulties? For me, leaving the church physically was really quite easy, a welcome relief, in fact. But leaving it spiritually, morally, and thoughtfully was an entire other matter, one that hovers over me to this day. The mental impact of Herbert W. Armstrong, Garner Ted Armstrong, and the dozens of ministers who so forcefully espoused the doctrines of the Worldwide Church of God still affect me to this day, 15 years after I physically left. I continue to wrestle with all that happened before and during my membership. I am therefore still in the process of fully leaving the Worldwide Church of God. I deeply fear that its impress on my mind will not be fully cleared until I enter my grave or get taken up upon Christ’s return. Until then, as I continue to “leave,” I continue to live, sadly with so much of the effects of the fears and familial disruptions that were necessarily a part of my experiences in the church.
Again, what I’m about to recount is not, per se, matters of leaving the WCG. But in fact, because of their continuing blazes on my memory and thoughts, as I try to wrestle with them and put them out of my mind, they are a direct and continuing part of leaving Armstrongism---if that's even fully possible.
I was first deceived as a high school kid back in the mid-1960s, when I started to listen to the powerfully persuasive broadcast voice of Garner Ted Armstrong. The man had an imposing voice, and he said things that really caused me to think. I was ripe for the unique perspectives Armstrong presented. From my childhood, I had a scientific mind (I’m now a biologist), and searched for little-known or alternative explanations for otherwise difficult problems. Garner Ted had me in his hands from the start. I was a complete sucker for his authoritative-sounding pronouncements.
At college, when on my own, I could listen each night to The World Tomorrow, with the professional introductions of Art Gilmore, followed by Garner Ted holding forth. I become even more hooked and entranced.
I subscribed to the World Tomorrow, and started getting some of the church’s literature. I became further mired in the slick theological slime being offered as profoundly truthful, formerly-hidden doctrine, the New Truths, as it were.
But because of my strong Presbyterian upbringing, and the very clear objections my family would have were I ever to admit even listening to The World Tomorrow or reading The Plain Truth, I did all of this surreptitiously. 
Like so many others in the late 60s, I was knocked over by the booklet, 1975 in Prophecy, which so very clearly said that the apocalypse would begin in 1972. There were to be just a few years of normal life left for me.
But all that while, I could never forsake my family and become a member. I was a secret, under the table “co-worker,” or something.
Then, 1972 and 1975 came and went, uneventfully. That should have been the tipoff. But it wasn’t. I was still deluded into believing the great men in Pasadena had the ear of God, and were the only humans in the modern era into whose ears God himself spoke, revealing astonishing things no one else could know or reveal. But I was learning of them by listening to Garner Ted and reading, when I could, church literature.
But I never revealed any of this to anyone, my family, my new wife—anyone. I was a closet believer of Herbert W. Armstrong and his cohorts, without ever giving even a dime to his operation.
Then, in 1982, while my wife was at church teaching Sunday school, as I was getting dressed for church, I heard Herbert Armstrong proclaim in a broadcast that the Pharisees of Christ’s time were simply going to be tossed into the Lake of Fire. I swallowed hard, realizing that that’s what was going to happen to me, too; as I had learned all of the truths, but was practicing none of them. I distinctly recall Armstrong saying earlier in my encounters with the WCG that “Jesus won’t save anyone who doesn’t obey the law.”
It was clear, if the Pharisees were going to be found guilty of the law, what chance did I have? The Pharisees kept the law to every minor point. I kept nothing of the law. I was doomed.
So, on the side, without consulting anyone, I contacted a WCG minister. My wife was furious, as she should have been. I had utterly betrayed her. She went to two WCG services, with my two pre-school children. That was enough. She instantly sensed her inappropriate, unbelieving presence among the True Believers, among the Elect. She never attended another service, and held a great many church-derived offenses against me, even to this day.
I can’t convey how utterly glad I was when Joseph Tkach, Sr. came down with his pronouncements negating the imperatives of the Sabbaths or tithings, and all the other reformations he generated. For the first time in 13 years of membership, I could see a way out, without eventually being slain by God in an excruciating cauldron of hot liquids and gases. For the very first time, I got a distant glimpse of Christian hope.
One Sabbath, I believe in the spring or summer of 1995, I went to services in the nearby high school, and as I walked in only about a third of the congregation was seated. No one said a thing to me, but I could feel the piercing eyes and questioning minds. Just before services began, under the leadership of a local elder, in the absence of the assigned minister, one of the members in attendance perceived my concerns and said, “Well, John, looks like you don’t know what happened, do you?” He went on to tell how about two-thirds of the congregation had taken offense at Tkach’s new teachings and had left to uphold Armstrong’s truths. I knew of none of this, and pondered how none of the departing “true members” had bothered to contact me and invite me to join them. Clearly, I wasn’t worthy of such consideration.
Here’s why. From day one it was always obvious that I was a non-typical, even questionable member. I was married, and had kids, but they never came or were invited to any church event. I’ll never forget a 70-minute sermon by the local pastor on the necessity of marrying only a church member, and how sinful, even damning, it would be to be married to a non-believing mate. The whole sermon was a condemnation of my so unfortunate situation. I left the service and wept for 20 minutes in the car as I drove back home alone. I was made to feel to be the lowest form of life ever allowed into a Worldwide Church of God hall. I was to be pitied, if not entirely looked down upon.
I have dozens of other, similar memories of utter insufficiencies, errors, and outright WCG sins I was responsible for. For 13 years in the church I never recall a single joyous moment. From the very start, up to the very end, fear pervaded my existence. Would I be disfellowshipped and thereby be irrevocably condemned? Would I be required to divorce my wife? Would she divorce me? How was I going to pay for my children’s college when I had to give 25% of my pay to Armstrong?   
My marriage suffered terribly. My wife had every right to leave me, and almost did. You see, I could leave the church, and did. But how can I, today, leave searing memories of a marriage utterly disintegrated by the teachings and practices of God’s One True Church?
So, thankfully I have left the Worldwide Church of God? But the Armstrongs and the Worldwide Church of God have not left me. Their destructive imprints and mental scars still hover over my life. I live with my wonderful wife, and she still prepares my meals, cleans my clothes, and takes care of me. But she has no interest in touching me, allowing me to give her a hug or a kiss, or express in any normal way the affections that should be normally between a man and a wife. Her residual anger and resentment often are expressed in accusatory and angry episodes of verbal revenge. I have learned not to harbor any resentment against her because of all of this. But it’s been extremely hard.
Again, I left Armstrongism, but it has not left me. Me, my wife, and my marriage, are permanently scared and tattered. My wife and I get along as best we can, but the hurts and mental bruises have not healed. They cannot. In her eyes, I committed a form of adultery so much more egregious had it been with a real women, instead of a religious whore.
Tonight, as I have for the last quarter-century, I’ll go to bed alone. I’ll pray for my wife, and ask God’s forgiveness for all the terrors I worked on my wife and family as I so desperately tried to keep from being slain in the Lake of Fire.
For many who left the Worldwide Church of God, or any of the Armstrongist descendant churches, their difficulties, too, were hard and notable. Many lost close friends, endured harsh words, and left behind wonderful memories of mutual fellowship. But for most of those, learning to live a new life might be a bit easier than it is for me. I can have no new life. My marriage is damaged beyond repair. My sins, so understandably, are to my wife unforgivable. As I did while a fearful member of the Worldwide Church of God, I can only plug along, by myself, hoping someday to find real human happiness.
I left the WCG. It has not, and never will, leave me. What a fool I was.
–John of Ohio
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John, you are in our hearts and our prayers. Thank you for your bravery in sharing this with us. I can't imagine this was easy for you.

Valued reader, do me this favor, if you would be so kind - please note the faith displayed in this story. Please note that God is not blamed. Please note the acceptance of personal responsibility. Please note that patience and hope are having their good work. This is not the ideal ending by any means, but the attitude couldn't be on a more proper course. These things make this story a hopeful one for me.

But if you relate to this story, know that you are not alone. We are all damaged goods; some of us more than others. But you are not alone! We are praying for you, whomever you may be. Please pray for each other.

God allows bad things to happen to "good" people. But I believe that it is in these bad times that we see God so clearly in the words and deeds of others. Maybe it's a complete stranger who helps us. Maybe we will never know that we have helped someone. Maybe our pain is for the good of someone else who suffers. Regardless, shine that light of Jesus. Shine it brightly! Pay if forward. Because you never know.

Never give up hope! Never give up hope.

(REV. 21: 4) And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away